Reginald

In the end, the questions you ask of yourself
determine the type of person you become.

If you’re human, you’ve shared in the experience of seeking validation.

It may be a simmering, subconscious compulsion – to get promoted, to get another degree, to lift a heavier weight or do a harder yoga pose – to be more, in some way, than you are now.

Or maybe you’re on the front lines of your battle for self-worth, constantly questioning yourself.  “Do I have a right to her love?  Surely she’ll leave me.”  “Am I good enough to let my voice be heard at this meeting?  I’d better defer to my colleagues.”

Whatever your striving for validation looks like, you are not alone.  Renowned social psychology researcher Albert Bandura showed that we’re constantly comparing ourselves against others and making decisions accordingly.

This is a smart strategy from an evolutionary perspective – fitting in is a good way to survive.

But we’re no longer trying simply to survive.  The luxury and curse of our era is that we can do virtually anything we want with our lives.

And in this world of possibility, you are leaving your greatest potential unfulfilled by letting others define what success means for you.

Damaging Comparisons

When I look around at my peers, I see brilliant people who are changing the world: doctors, lawyers, humanitarian sector workers, blossoming corporate champions, entrepreneurs, etc.

My friends are awesome, but if I tried to define my own success by comparing myself to them, I’d feel terrible.

I know this because I’ve done it.

In my early 20s, I worried that I wasn’t good at picking up girls at the bar.  As foolish as that sounds, I kept trying because I saw friends do it and let it become a measure of my worth.

More comparisons followed.  Could I hack it as a management consultant?  Could I get into a top business school?  These were self-imposed tests that I wasn’t even aware of while they were happening.

I went through years of experimentation and self-doubt in order to cultivate the resolve that I now have about my path.

I still find immense value in different perspectives and love to hear about the journeys my friends are on, but I also know that I have my own journey.

The most important step for me was finally becoming aware that I was making comparisons, and deciding to create my own, different measures of success.

Where in your life are you making these damaging comparisons?

One Simple Question: How Do You Define Success?

Many people achieve the outward trappings of success without ever reflecting on what really matters to them.  They are like racehorses with blinders on their eyes, galloping around a track, trying to “win.”

Taking these blinders off can be bewildering.  If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by the totality of your free will, you have experienced this.

Meet that bewildering freedom by asking yourself one fundamental question:  What does success mean to me?

Have you ever honestly asked yourself this question?  Or have you simply adopted your priorities from everyone around you?

Are you crystal clear on what success means for you?

Here are a six ways you could measure success:

• Are you a Fortune 500 CEO, or in line to become one?
• Have you won any political campaigns?
• Have you won any international athletic competitions?  Do you hold any world records?
• Have you won a Grammy Award?  A Nobel Prize?
• Do people turn their heads when they see your car?
• Does your smartphone contacts database have more than 10 celebrities in it?

Here are a six other ways you could measure success:

• Have you dropped everything to help a friend in need?
• Did you do any favors today for complete strangers?
• Have you recently listened to someone else’s story without talking about yourself?
• Have you spoken up against friends, family and authority figures that were in the wrong by their words or actions?  Even when it was hard to do so?
• Have you kept silent when you knew you were right, knowing that an argument would be useless?
• Have you been patient, compassionate, and gentle toward those who have wronged you?

The point is not that one measure of success is any better or worse than another.

The point is that you get to choose how you define it for yourself.

Simply recognize that the more conscious and deliberate you can be about what success means for YOU, the more empowered you will be to pursue the path that’s true for you.

Your turn…

How do you define success?  What would make you successful in your own mind?  Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.

Photo by: Christopher Mueller

It is not enough to be busy…
The question is:  What are you busy doing?

I’ve always been someone driven to excel and make the most out of this wild ride called life.

So when I read Tim Ferriss’ book The 4-Hour Workweek, a new world of possibilities opened up to me.  After discovering his personal productivity tips, I knew the way I worked was never going to be the same.

Over the ensuing 18 months I diligently applied Ferriss’ strategies, from utilizing Parkinson’s Law to following the 80/20 Principle, to eliminating distractions and batching tasks.  And I saw solid results.

But always looking to optimize, I decided to take it a step further.  I decided to see if I could “out-Tim Ferriss” Tim Ferriss.

So I spent some additional time studying the habits of other successful people – reading their books, blogs, etc. to see what was working for them.  And then I started experimenting with a variety of these strategies also to see just how productive I could get.

Some of my experiments failed, but many were resounding successes.  Today, I want to share 12 unconventional productivity strategies that worked well for me.  As I built habits around each of them, my daily efforts became noticeably more efficient.  And I’m confident they can do the same for you.

1.  Meditate

By now I’m sure you’ve heard about all the wonderful health and cognitive benefits meditation offers.  But did you know Stanford University researchers consider it the #1 way to boost willpower?  Regular meditation increases grey matter in the prefrontal cortex, which governs decision-making.  Over time, you’ll greatly improve your ability to avoid distractions and stay focused on the task at hand.  To learn how to start meditating, check out this article.

2.  Optimize Your Morning Ritual

How you spend your first waking hour sets the tone for the rest of your day.  In his program Get the Edge, peak performance coach Tony Robbins strongly encourages taking at least 15 minutes every morning to get your body and mind in an optimal state.  This can be done through meditation, visualization, physical activity, prayer, reading, practicing gratitude, yoga, journaling, or even taking a walk around the block.

3.  Visualize Your Ideal Day

It is common practice among elite athletes to visualize their performance before game-time.  Golf legend Jack Nicklaus once said, “I never hit a shot, not even in practice, without having a very sharp, in-focus picture of it in my mind.”  You can use the same strategy to increase your productivity.  First, get clear on what you want to accomplish during the day, then visualize yourself going through the different activities swiftly and efficiently.  Once you open your eyes, you’ll be ready to make your own day a masterful performance.

4.  Rest Before You’re Tired

One of the keys to optimal productivity is to stay mentally fresh through the day.  Productivity expert Tony Schwartz, author of the book The Power of Full Engagement, tells us, “Human beings are designed to pulse rhythmically between spending and renewing energy.  That’s how we operate at our best.”  In other words, a great way to avoid fatigue is to take one or two small breaks every hour.  I personally use the app Time Out which basically blocks me out of my computer for 10 minutes every 50 minutes.  By resting regularly, you’ll keep your energy up and get more done over the course of a day.

5.  Get Active During Your Breaks

What should you do to optimize your 10-minute break?  While it may be tempting to head straight to Facebook, that’s not your best bet.  What I’ve found to be optimal is 5 minutes of physical activity (50 jumping jacks, 20 push-ups and 20 squats) which increases blood flow to the brain, followed by 5 minutes of meditation that calms down the mind and helps you get clarity over what needs to get done next.

6.  Work with Intention

The Internet is a wonderful tool, but it’s also the greatest time-waster in history.  To avoid falling prey to its endless distractions, make sure that whenever you sit down at your computer, you are intentional about your work.  Get crystal clear on what you’re about to do and write it down.  Once that’s done, get straight to work.  Don’t waste 1 minute.  Even checking Facebook or your email once is bound to throw you off track.

7.  Unplug

In a world that’s constantly connected, we forget how taxing this is to our cognitive system.  Try to take 1 day a week to unplug and do a technology detox.  Put your computer aside and seek out nature, spend time with your loved ones, read a book, paint, journal, lay in a hammock, call a friend, volunteer, etc.  If you’re courageous, why not put your phone on airplane mode for a few hours too?  I promise, the next day, you’ll wake up feeling refreshed and refocused.

8.  Optimize Your Work Set-Up

When working on a laptop, it’s easy to get a very bad posture.  The laptop is too low relative to your eye level, which gets you to slouch or look down at an awkward angle.  This is not only bad for your neck and back, but it’s also detrimental to your productivity.  A good posture energizes us, while a bad posture makes us more lethargic.  Consider buying a laptop stand (with an external keyboard and mouse) or setting up a standing desk.  Check this video to see my own work set-up.

9.  Learn to Speed Read

Reading is an essential part of daily life, in both personal and professional environments.  Learning to speed-read is a great (and easier than you think) way to improve productivity, but it holds one caveat.  It’s really hard to do on a computer screen.  So instead, you can use a neat web application called Spreeder.  It allows you to paste the text into a box and it then flashes the words across your screen at the speed you choose.  It makes speed-reading on the computer almost effortless and is sure to save you time and energy.

10.  Be Grateful

In his excellent TED Talk The Secret to Happy Work, Shawn Anchor reveals that our brain performs up to 30% better when we’re feeling happy.  A simple way to boost your happiness level is to take a few seconds every hour to think about the things you’re grateful for.  This can be anything, from your health, to your access to food, the internet, your family, your friends, the beautiful weather, etc.  Really feel the gratitude and you’ll be both happier and more productive.

11.  Practice Optimal Breathing

Take a second to notice your breath right now.  It is deep and full, or short and shallow?  If you’re like the majority of people, it’s probably the latter.  When we’re working, it’s easy to get so caught up in what we do that we forget to breathe properly.  Taking a few deep mindful breaths regularly will help you relax, get present, and oxygenate your brain.

12.  Ask for Help

If you’re reading this article, there’s a good chance you’re the type of person who takes pride in doing things all by yourself.  For the longest time, I did the same.  But recently, I’ve realized that asking for help not only makes my life a LOT easier, it also gives other people a chance to share their gifts and feel more accomplished.  Win-win!  Next time you’re stuck or unsure what to do next, don’t bang your head against the wall, just ask for help.

I’ve shared a lot of strategies with you, and you can’t apply all of them at once, so I invite you to take a few seconds right now and decide which ONE you’re going to consciously implement this week.

When you feel like you’ve got that one down, come back to this post and choose one more, and so forth.  Within a few weeks, I guarantee your productivity will reach new heights.

Phil Drolet is a Peak Performance Coach and runs a blog called The Feel Good Lifestyle where he helps people optimize their lifestyle and take bold action towards their dreams.  He also created an online course where he teaches students how to become (nearly) superhuman.

Photo by: Anthony Sigalas

Inspired

Once upon a time, two thirteen-year-old boys were watching the track and field Summer Olympics events on television.  Neither of them had previously spent any time watching amateur athletes strive with their heart and soul to be their absolute best, so the boys were mesmerized by the passion, determination, and athletic grace displayed by the Olympic competitors.  In a moment of unadulterated inspiration, the two of them made a pact to become Olympic track and field competitors before their twenty-first birthdays.

That afternoon, over a glass of chocolate milk, they mapped out a rigorous training plan that involved frequent workouts both before and after school.  “If we stick to our training, we’ll be just as good the athletes on T.V.” one boy said to the other.  “I can’t wait to get started!” the other boy replied.

The next morning at 6AM the two boys woke-up, put their running shoes on, and met outside to begin their first official training session.  As they began running down the block, both of them had radiant smiles on their mugs.  “This is awesome!” one boy exclaimed as they trotted toward the sunrise.

Reality Raises One Question

About nine minutes later, a mile down the road, the harsh truth inevitably revealed itself.  Both of them were out of shape, slow, and completely out of breath.  They had no previous athletic training and no clue how difficult it would be.  All they could think about now were the aches, pains and exhaustion their bodies were experiencing.

Huffing and puffing, both boys stopped running and one fell to the ground on the side of the road.  “This is way harder than I thought,” the fallen boy said between breaths.

“Tell me about it,” the other boy agreed as he, too, fell to the ground gasping for air.  “Do you think it’s worth it?”

The other boy did not answer.  Instead, both of them rested on the cool morning grass in complete silence for several minutes, slowly regaining their breath, and thinking about the question.

Suddenly the first fallen boy forced himself to his feet.  “Yeah, I do think it’s worth it!  Do you?”

The other boy stood up slowly and nodded.  “Yeah, dude.  I think so too.”

And without further hesitation, both of them began running again.

The Journey

The following month, they joined their middle school track and field team.  With continued practice and guidance from their coach, both of them eventually placed in the top ten percentile for various middle school track competitions during their seventh and eighth grade school years.

In high school, they spent all four years on the track and field and cross country running teams.  Both of them consistently placed in the top five percentile for their grade and won various gold, silver, and bronze awards in the district competitions.  During their senior year, their track and field team made it to the state competition.  One boy walked away with a silver medal for the long jump and the other won a bronze medal for the 1500 meter run.

They both earned and accepted track and field scholarships to different state colleges.  Over the course of the next two years, even though they were apart, they trained passionately, competed head to head against one another on several occasions, and each won various collegiate events.  One time, they even placed first and second overall in the same exact event.

And although neither of them earned an Olympic medal, during their junior year of college, at the age of 20, they were reunited as teammates when they represented their country in the Summer Olympics.

Conclusion

When I was young, I was fortunate enough to have parents and mentors who taught me that the people who achieve their dreams and make the greatest impact in the world – whether athletically, musically, politically, technologically or otherwise – are rarely the most talented or gifted individuals.  They are instead the ones who work the hardest, and who are willing to overcome all obstacles to see their dreams through to fruition.

The moments when we feel uncertain about how to move forward, when we are inspired by our dreams but overwhelmed by the work required to achieve them, are the moments when we must ask ourselves one simple question:

Do you think it’s worth it?

Photo by: Millzero